Satire
Better CDCS
Ever Better CDCS
No amount of rearranging your labs and workshops will ever make Orgo go away, you poor suckers. Dump those "required" courses and take these ones instead!
Nine Trey Bloods
Seligman indicted for affiliation with Nine Trey Bloods
The University President is the latest to be linked to the infamous gang by rapper 6ix9ine, also known as David Hernandez, also known as "Snitch."
sexuality
UR Tech: How to insert a USB drive sensually, carnally, and right-side up
First you should make sure the rigid little guy you’ve got in your hand is, in fact, a USB. Could it be a shiny Lego, or a penis?
CT Recommends
CT Recommends: Wikipedia
The official Campus Times guide to using Wikipedia! Pro-tip: Be sure not to get Google.com’s and Wikipedia’s “search bars” confused. They look very alike.
jobs
Make crazy money while still going to school with this one weird trick!
Getting a part time job at the University seems like a good idea, but you should avoid doing so at all costs. Here are three easy steps to make mega moolah in college!
Politics
Punxsutawney Phil gives State of the Forest address
From Bernie Loonders to Sean Parrotty, reactions were strong to President Punxsutawney Phil's State of the Forest Address.
Satire
The difficulties of living in Genesee Hall
You would think Genesee Hall to be perfect, but it actually has more problems than any of the others. Even the freshman quad.
Satire
Echo takes social media by storm
Rather than attempt actual, old-fashioned human contact, let our algorithms pick friends for you!
Satire
Poking fun at the news
California has banned sex for killer whales kept in captivity. In response, moviemakers are casting for the new installment of “Free Willy’s Willy.”
Satire
Queen Elsa’s retribution
Citing the failure that was the last Rochester winter, Ice Queen Elsa has promised to set things right this time around.
