Narratives
grave robbing
Help! I can’t get rid of my quarantine body
People keep telling me to “get rid of my quarantine body,” and there’s only one explanation: I’ve been found out.
COVID-19
I have taken the Flag Lounge into my own hands
There were 163 flags hanging in the lounge, each one three by five feet. That’s a lot to just "hide." Where are they now?
COVID-19
My drug-induced quarantine haze
Two weeks is a long time to spend alone with your thoughts. Maybe too long.
Narratives
Zoom class derailed by UR student’s dog
At first, aside from the occasional student from a different university using the wrong Zoom link, everything was normal. Then the dog entered the picture.
Narratives
Demon Girl: Sick as Hell 2, COVID-boogaloo
I’ve heard a lot of people describing the coronavirus situation as “hell.” Sorry friends, but Hell is much worse. I know from experience.
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Narratives
How I learned to stop worrying and love the sqURm
Armed with an R&D survey and a budget of $0, I set out to create a new mascot for UR's largest demographic: those nerds who failed the Pacer Test.
Narratives
Roommate leaves raw beef on counter, disappears for weeks
When I came back, she was gone. All that remained was the faint smell of fermentation and a large hunk of ground beef on the counter. Raw. Bare.
Narratives
I look like Lenny from ‘Shark Tale,’ and that’s okay
There are worse cartoon characters to look like. Lenny is voiced by Jack Black, which is awesome. On the other hand, most people think I look like a shark.
Narratives
A brief log of President Mangelsdorf’s President’s Day activities
Mangelsdorf put on her party hat. She smiled. She could kill any one of her VPs with her bare hands. She had the strength. She was president.
Narratives
An interview with the murderer of that kid who asks unrelated questions in lecture to seem smart
A kid who always asked unrelated questions in lecture was probably murdered last week. Now I’ve got an exclusive interview with the suspected killer.