Now that this new choice plan has spread across campus, administrators have decided to jump on the heavily ticketed and booted bandwagon and provide some choice for graduating seniors.

This May, members of the Class of 2001 will be able to decide whether their diplomas will be designed in a traditional style or in a new ?Proof of Purchase? design.

This new diploma, or receipt, as it will now be called, will come complete with a 90-day money-back guarantee.

In case your degree doesn?t yield a job within this period, you may return your receipt to UR as payment for your unpaid parking tickets, totaling $120K in early Y2K U.S. dollar value, before the market headed south.

Don?t like your new options here at UR? You could always leave. But that?s up to you.



America hates its children

I feel exhausted whenever I hear conservatives fall upon the mindlessly affective “think of the children” defense of their barbarous proposals for school curriculums and general social regressivism.

Teddy’s Travels: Ithaca, NY

Obviously, every ‘Teddy’s Travels’ needs adventure, and after our unremarkable stay in Ithaca, I began to wonder if perhaps we would break the streak.

Masked protesters disrupt Boar’s Head, protest charges against students

Protesters gathered in front of the Highe Table and urged the University to drop the criminal charges against the four students recently charged with second-degree criminal mischief, saying that the University’s response is disproportionate compared to other bias-related incident reports.