Now that this new choice plan has spread across campus, administrators have decided to jump on the heavily ticketed and booted bandwagon and provide some choice for graduating seniors.

This May, members of the Class of 2001 will be able to decide whether their diplomas will be designed in a traditional style or in a new ?Proof of Purchase? design.

This new diploma, or receipt, as it will now be called, will come complete with a 90-day money-back guarantee.

In case your degree doesn?t yield a job within this period, you may return your receipt to UR as payment for your unpaid parking tickets, totaling $120K in early Y2K U.S. dollar value, before the market headed south.

Don?t like your new options here at UR? You could always leave. But that?s up to you.



In Memoriam, Freddy D.

Months went by. Freddy D. seemingly disappeared from the minds and memories of many. Then one day, I had a Carrie Bradshaw moment.

My crusade against the UR parking office

I allowed my predator to believe I was prey — let them roam the jungle, beat their chest, and act like they could never be defeated.

Weeding out space problems

The administration is using gated up rooms in Spurrier and Todd Union for the cultivation of high-quality recreational marijuana.