Chivalry has laid down his sword, put his feet on the coffee table and unbuttoned his pants. Days of walking hand in hand on the moor are extinct. Even the days of sharing malts are over.
The key word in contemporary relationships seems to be independence. Yet, in the midst of this proudly self-reliant culture, collegiate relationships have become anything but independent. In fact I would call them co-dependent.
I am sure you have witnessed these whirlwind couplings. Two college students meet, are attracted to one another and then the next time you turn around they have become attached at the hip.
It becomes so quickly intense that even the people in it don’t know what hit them.
Perhaps this relationship speed happens because so much of the interaction takes place in the bedroom. Perhaps it’s because the girl next door is literally a wall apart.
Or perhaps it’s because the freedom in a student’s schedule allows one to spend an ungodly amount of time with their significant other.
Often these relationships come at a high cost to the people in them and as an annoyance to the people around them. Sometimes people become so absorbed in the relationship that they forget how to function without the other person.
At an age where they should be asserting their individuality they end up becoming half of a whole.
Roommates find that another person is living with them ? one that they never signed up for. These relationships seem to beg the question, “Can this be healthy?”
College allows you to be free with a very large safety net under you. This safety net allows students to act wildly and recklessly because they have no real responsibilities and no real fear of consequences. Therefore, the thought “slow down” doesn’t become part of your conscious vocabulary.
Unfortunately, what this means for relationships is that they can progress so fast that the people in them lose control of themselves.
College is supposed to be about becoming an adult, learning about yourself and being able to juggle your time. It often seems that this brand of extreme dating throws off any sort of balance.
Why is it necessary for people to throw themselves into relationships that dominate their existences? Is it because they miss the security of family?
Maybe it is because people aren’t used to having this freedom and they don’t know what to do with themselves.
If you’re in one of those relationships, look around. Do you have a life outside your significant other? If you don’t, you might have a problem.
Just think ? if you were to break up with this person, what would you do? Remember, it’s not necessary or healthy to spend all your time with one other person, no matter how cute he or she might be.
Locker can be reached at elocker@campustimes.org.
