My crusade against the UR parking office

I allowed my predator to believe I was prey — let them roam the jungle, beat their chest, and act like they could never be defeated.

Free the monkeys

These poor creatures were being experimented on to learn calculus, neuroscience, electrical circuitry, and art. They were staying up until 4 a.m. trying to figure out how to complete these wild assignments.

A timely appeal to the youth: Mangelsdorf covers Taylor Swift’s ‘You Need to Calm Down’

So I figure, good ol’ Tay Tay Swizzy is the bridge to make my anti-union stances clear—maybe these damn kids will finally shut the hell up.”