Courtesy Unknown
By Bryan Burke Humor Editor and Lilli Tamm
February 19, 2023

I was wearing a flannel and cargo pants. I hope you were clothed?? 

I was taking notes, listening to the lull of the shittily constructed desks creaking under the weight of 10:25 a.m. academia. I like to consider myself as a whimsical lad, which can be quite easily seen by the name of my phone on AirDrop: ‘iPhone 9.’ (My iPad also has a goofy number associated with it.) But my laptop has been the victim of a critical blunder. I made the mistake of not renaming it. To that very device, I was AirDropped a singular .png file, drawn on GoodNotes with colors galore. “When the desk squeaks sound like BIRDS. Squeak squeak.” My world moved.

I don’t know who you are. I do not want to know. I think I could fear you, if such were your intention. You singled me out and left me haunted, bereft, and alone. Could I buy you a drink? Can we talk about stuff? Preferably birds and/or desks?

Tagged: birb m4? missed connections
Bryan Burke '25 Humor Editor
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