Yeah that’s right. Put down your venti iced coffee and stop “studying” in PRR to take this quiz…sksksksksk. 

  1. When your Nike Air Force One crosses the barrier from first-year quad to frat quad, does MERT take your ass out?
  2. Did you evacuate the entirety of Sue B. as a first-year by burning a single bag of fucking popcorn?
  3. Is Q&i where you love to study, and do you take up an entire booth by yourself to save for your “friends?”
  4. Do you get heated about old Starbucks?
  5. Was it your hydro flask that went clink clank thunk down the stairs of Hubbell in your Bio 110 lecture?
  6. Do you go to Pittsford Dairy on a weekly basis?
  7. Do you currently have boxes of White Claws stashed under your first-year bed in a suitcase so Public Safety can’t check that shit?
  8. Did you spend over $100 at the L.L Bean pop up and then claim it was a “deal?”
  9. Did you come to college 100 percent sure you were gonna be pre-med…and I oop?
  10. Do you carry a reusable mug and or straw because “save the turtles sksks?”
  11. Is your life’s resume in your email signature?
  12. Did you spend more than 10 minutes taking a single photo in front of the Meliora sign?
  13. Did you say, “Wait guys, let’s take a boomerang?” at any point this weekend?
  14. Is Big Bootie Mix Volume 11 your go-to song?
  15. Do you own a backpack that means Swedish Fox in Swedish? *Fjällräven, for those of you confused about which weird word this refers to
  16. Did you go from criticizing AirPods relentlessly when they came out to now surreptitiously slipping those babies into your ears at the gym and/or any time you’re walking anywhere on campus, even if it’s for the one minute Starbucks to Q&i trek?

If you answered yes to five or fewer questions, you should probably transfer because you’re not taking full advantage of all the great things Rochester has to offer, and also because you’re a loser.

If you answered yes to more than 10, you’re 100% that b****, Sarah Mangelsdorf is your queen, pink drinks are your life, and you are also a Rochester VSCO girl. Congratulationsksk. Now, for the love of God, stop procrastinating by taking Campus Times quizzes and get back to studying for your midterm … and I oop.



America hates its children

I feel exhausted whenever I hear conservatives fall upon the mindlessly affective “think of the children” defense of their barbarous proposals for school curriculums and general social regressivism.

The ‘wanted’ posters at the University of Rochester are unambiguously antisemitic. Here’s why.

As an educator who is deeply committed to fostering an open, inclusive environment and is alarmed by the steep rise in antisemitic crimes across this country and university campuses, I feel obligated to explain why this poster campaign is clearly an expression of antisemitism

Top 10 worst albums of 2024

Although incredible music is released every year, so does terrible music.