Mr. Brenneman, we hear your pain. A day without the possibility of bacon cheeseburgers is a day without much hope of Meliora (the pursuit of betterment). Instead, we have arrived at bitterment. In my effort to improve the world before I finally leave the campus (die), I pledge a pound of bacon if you can get them to cook it. I think keeping it as a stealth menu choice may relieve the sous chef of angst and culpability. In Meliora.
-J. Ty DibbleClass of 1973